I can't wait till this fecking degree is over. I've had it up to here, I really have. Someone pour me a drink. Why the hell am I writing an essay on mass literature in 1980s China? Or, for that matter, an essay on Zimbabwean spirit medium practices? What happened to my education after 1999? Did I just flip out and go nuts?

Oh, wait, yes. That would indeed appear to be what I did. The best of it is, despite being so close to the end, I still have plenty of time to blow it and fail the whole course. Whoop-de-do.
Time to get back to China - they have longer opening hours.